Random musing on my experiences : Bad Teachers and Dropping out
I have always loved languages, and when I was little I was studying French from books my parents got me, because there weren’t any classes for it in elementary school.
Once I got a new teacher who said she spoke French, and I was so happy and excited. I enthusiastically raised my hand and said some things that I knew in French.
And this lady…like, ranted at me in fluent french for a very brief while and then was basically like, you don’t know French, that is knowing French. I was embarrassed in front of the whole class and I felt so hurt and ashamed. I really felt like I had done something wrong.
Now that I am a teacher myself I have occasion to reflect back on exactly how fucked up that experience was. What has to be wrong with you as a teacher to go out of your way to “show up” one of your students, a child, as less competent than you? And unfortunately that isn’t nearly the only time that a teacher told me how much I didn’t know in the meanest way possible, or assured me that I wouldn’t amount to much or would fail to accomplish some specific thing.
I might not even have dropped out of high school if it weren’t for one of those teachers. The one my father refused to be in the same room with because he “might do something he’d regret.”
Even so my parents were upset with my decision to drop out and forever-after angry with the (IMO Awesome) teacher who recommended that I do so after hearing the details of my situation with Crappy!Teacher.
I do suppose it would have been cool to graduate so my parents could see me walk, (something which would have been even better in hindsight, since my mother did not live to see me graduate college) but outside of that I don’t regret it at all. It didn’t ruin my life. I still went to college (“on time,” too) and now no one even cares (or, largely, even bothers knowing), that I’m a high school drop out. I do think its an option anyone should think about if high school has become unbearable or graduation nigh impossible for whatever reason.
There’s no shame in it, and everyone will see that once you get a little farther away from the event itself. It’s your life and it’s your right to make the decision you feel is best.
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